Also, please, Sally needs a second nameplate on her desk. After “Sally Po, MD,” she needs one that reads “Sally Po, Distinguished Lesbian.”
Okay! I found my prompt for the day!
@fadedsepiascribbles We all know Trowa barely earned “functional,” but fortunately for him, I ran out of functional gays so he got bumped up.
Sally deserves everything, give her all the titles and awards! :D
@gwkimmy how could you accuse my sunshine daughter of being anything but distinguished?? Okay yeah she has questionable taste in men BUT everyone has flaws.
Also, Une actually crosses over the alignment chart: Colonel Une is Disaster Bi, Lady Une is Functional Bi, and then post-EW Une is Distinguished Bi.
Making fun of Gundam Wing will never stop being great but you’re lying if you say you didn’t watch as a kid with eyes full of tears as Relena shouted that she wouldnt like a rose but prefered to wear the blood of the people who killed jer dad, and then pulled a gun out of the bow on the back of her dress and shot Lady Une while yelling THIS IS FOR MY DAD!!! and you felt your soul leave your body and your wig be blown all the way to Japan bc you’d never seen a girl with that much big dick energy
Hairdresser: We’re going to have to use a color remover to take out the blue pigment, then apply more pigment to allow for the proteins in the hair to adhere to it. Then possibly mix three different types of toners to reach the goal of your natural hair color.
Hairdresser: pretty simple
Me: this is chemistry
Hairdresser: yeah, but people don’t like when we talk that way
Hairdresser: so you’re a mortician?
Me: apprentice
Hairdresser: do you know why formaldehyde is used in clothing?
Me: I didn’t know that was a thing
Hairdresser: I think it’s due to the preserving qualities? But I don’t think that’s right.
Me: It’s not just a preservative, it’s also a disinfectant ‘cause it destroys bacteria as well as their food supply. It’s also a dehydrator.
Hairdresser: why not just use alcohol?
Me: good question. Formaldehyde is super cheap, so probably to cut costs
Hairdresser: is it really a carcinogen?
Me: yeah, I’m going to have so much cancer
Hairdresser: so you’re going natural to work at a funeral home?
Me: yeah
Hairdresser: while still in school?
Me: well we work in the funeral homes so we have uuuuh … experience with cases
Hairdresser: you can just say bodies it’s fine
Me: oh thank god
Five Minutes Later
Me: yeah so we don’t do autopsies it’s one of my pet peeves
Hairdresser: what if someone wakes up while you’re embalming them?
Me: there’s a huge difference between a living body and a dead one
second hairdresser: I think we should add more toner, but yeah I think rigor mortis would make it pretty obvious
Me: that and being in a fridge for a few days you will be dead by the time you get to us
Hairdresser: I think pumping them full of a carcinogen would help with that
concept: a game called “john mulaney or cecil palmer?” where you have to guess if a quote was said by popular stand-up comedian john mulaney or fictional radio host cecil gershwin palmer
this might sound easy, but please keep in mind that john mulaney has
said “whoa, that tall child looks terrible! get some rest, tall child!
you can’t keep burning the candle at both ends!” and cecil palmer has
said “alligators: can they kill your children? yes.”
John has said “🎶Because we’re Delta Airlines, and life is a fucking nightmare! 🎶” and Cecil has said “Delta Airlines, because it’s not like you’re safe anywhere else.”
A concept: John Mulaney is a former radio host from Night Vale
John Mulaney was an intern everyone thought died but instead he just got moved into our dimension
we’ve started feeding this tortoiseshell-point siamese recently. she’s beautiful, aside from the fact she has disturbingly big, bulging blue eyes. we’ve started calling her… ‘goop’
it’s goop!
GUESS WHO HAD GOOPLETS! SIX ENTIRE BABIES! mama goop held onto her gooplings for an entire week longer than she had to, so the gooplitos came out very well done and fluffy!!
update: 10 weeks later… i have taken two of the gooplets for myself… sweet link and hella zelda are inseparable. as for the other four (trixie, dobby, poppy, and marigold), my mom is going to fix them & keep em as barn cats!
The real reason it’s a fucking travesty Peter Parker is “straight” is that he would have a fucking field day making gay jokes. Imagine Spiderman wit mixed with millennial gay humour. He’d be unstoppable
This post is pissing people off so I’m gonna add to it:
*villain du jour flirts with Spiderman* woah! I know I swing both ways, but your way isn’t one of em
***
Intellectual™ white supremacist: and when I’m done the entire world will be one homogeneous society-
Spidey: buddy the only homo-genius here is me step off
***
Villain: *gestures to the eyesore that is the Spiderman suit* what kind of fashion is this
Spidey, a gay, knowing that all his villains commit crime in their fursuits: fucking respectable is what it is
***
Villain, talking about the plague that is vigilantes: your way of life disgusts me
Spidey, with narrowed eyes: is this homophobia or arachnophobia
Be vigilant, people. 2020 is closer than you think, and I’ve already been seeing suspicious “joke” posts, anti-Democrat “memes,” and interview quotes and screenshots purposely taken out of context. We cannot have a repeat of 2016. We just cannot.
If you see someone on here or on Twitter saying things like “both sides are the same” or “Democrats and Republicans both have issues regarding ______,” assume it’s from a planted Russian troll or a blatant MAGA member.
divine-blade-muses said: Just a question. Being a die hard GW fan that i am im kind of nervous to check out Frozen Teardrop, would you recommend checking it out or staying away from it?
I think that depends on what you want from it.
Like, if you want a continuation of Gundam Wing -...
